


Booty Bends

by Warp5Complex_Archivist



Category: Star Trek: Enterprise
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-04-08
Updated: 2006-04-08
Packaged: 2018-08-16 00:02:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 849
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8079067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warp5Complex_Archivist/pseuds/Warp5Complex_Archivist
Summary: Reed contemplates the sultry reading Mayweather has given him.  (12/10/2002)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Kylie Lee, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Warp 5 Complex](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Warp_5_Complex), the software of which ceased to be maintained and created a security hazard. To make future maintenance and archive growth easier, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but I may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Warp 5 Complex collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/Warp5Complex).

"Booty bends?" Malcolm muttered quietly to himself, seemingly unaware he'd spoken aloud. He frowned speculatively at the PADD in his hand as he leaned forward from his relaxed position to rest his elbows against the mess hall table.

"Hm?" Travis asked. He glanced up from his own PADD. The two sat alone off in a relatively peaceful corner of the room. It was getting into late evening, so they had little other company.

Malcolm huffed and set the PADD down. "I can't take this drivel any more, Travis."

"Drivel?" Travis objected. "It's fine literature."

"Not in my home."

"Your parents are too uptight."

"No objections there," Malcolm glossed over any further comments on his own family life and continued, "But this is far from fine literature."

"It's a classic! It has everything. Love and war, angst and jealousy, passion and hate. You can't ask for much more."

"But this author...She's making up words as she goes along!" Malcolm picked up his PADD to show Travis the current passage. "Booty bends? What the hell does that mean?"

"It's kinda self explanatory, Malcolm." Travis flashed him a grin. "Take a wild guess."

Malcolm rolled his eyes before he skimmed through pages on the PADD. "She has no imagination. And no sense of how to write for a male character. I swear this," he flipped up to the top and the title, "Mary Sue Johnson doesn't know the first thing about the male psyche. Or a realistic grasp on what is physically possible for a man to do."

Travis chuckled. "She does have a good imagination when it comes to the sex scenes..."

"Five orgasms in one evening?" Malcolm scoffed.

"Don't knock it till you've tried it."

Malcolm gave him a skeptical glance. "Don't try to convince me you've- -"

"Hey, it was one really nice night."

"Really nice? Five orgasms and you call it 'really nice'?" Malcolm snorted. "I've never met anyone so bad at lying until I met you."

"Well, it gets a little overwhelming the fourth or fifth time. It's not something I'd want to do every evening." Then Travis smiled slyly. "But I wouldn't mind trying it again some time."

Malcolm raised his eyebrows in mock surprise at the suggestion, although his eyes sparked with interest, before looking back at his PADD. "It's not just the five orgasms. I've never even heard of some of these positions she writes. I'm not even sure they're all possible."

"That's what erotica scenes are all about. You don't want to read about the missionary position do you? With no foreplay?"

"I'm not sure if this is my cup of tea period."

"We could take some of these 'wild' positions and try them out. Prove Mary Sue wrong or right." Travis scooted his chair a little closer to press his thigh against Malcolm's.

Malcolm pretended noninterest in Travis' advances as he set the PADD down again with a shake of his head. "She doesn't even seem to understand how a man thinks."

"We're not sex-crazed testosterone factories, ready to ravage one another at a moment's notice?"

Malcolm laughed lightly. "Well, at times perhaps..." He half-grinned with a sly twist of his lips. "But—"

"No buts, Malcolm. She captures enough of what it is to be a man, then heightens some of the characteristics to have the most fun. It's difficult to sit down and write eloquent paragraphs of plot leading up to the great sex." Travis snickered. "Then again, most men aren't usually that interested in the romance part."

"Oh no?" Malcolm tilted his chair back away from Travis. "Well there goes your anniversary present."

Travis batted his eyes pitifully. "I said 'most' men..."

Malcolm chuckled and leaned back upright, squeezing Travis' shoulder gently. "All right, fine, but I'm not forgiving her for that 'booty bends' nonsense. What a mockery of the English language."

Travis blurted out, "But it took me forever to come up with a way to describe how you bend over so nicely and show off your—" He blushed as he cut himself off.

"Excuse me?" Malcolm blinked, not sure he'd heard Travis correctly.

Travis looked away, fingering the table nervously. "Oh, um, nothing."

Malcolm pieced it together. "You wrote this? You came up with that daft line?" He picked up the PADD again to skim through it once more.

"Um, kinda...sorta...yeah."

"Why didn't you just tell me you wrote it? All fifty pages? And why on Earth did you pick a female pen name?"

Travis glanced up. "I wasn't sure what you'd think. I wanted you to give it an honest, brutal reading."

"And you made up 'booty bends' after me?"

Travis smirked shyly. "You inspire great creativity."

Malcolm smiled back. "I'll have to read this more thoroughly and give you my honest opinion. And you didn't have to pretend it wasn't yours." Noticing they were now alone in the mess hall, Malcolm kissed Travis, lips reassuring and soothing the other man. Then he turned back to the PADD. "But I still hate 'booty bends'."

"You've just never seen what your booty can do," Travis winked.


End file.
